Face Funk

You're An Asshole (Hip Garbage)

2011-05-14T18:52:00.001-07:00

The real asshole here is me, for knowing what the fuck TurboGrafx 16 even is.

Heroes Con Disaster of 2010

2011-02-03T22:45:00.000-08:00

Did I ever mention that I tabled at HeroesCon this past summer in North Carolina? It was pretty bad. I thought I was gonna feel like this...

But instead I felt like this...

Anyways, I did get some cool drawings done while I was out there so I posted a bunch of them on my flicker account along with (have a seat because this one is going to floor you) MY ENTIRE COMIC ABOUT DIOGENES THAT WOULD HAVE PREVIOUSLY SET YOU BACK ABOUT 8 BUCKS! That's right, a free comic. Check it out man! Here are a few of the bestworst drawings from the group.

Power Man!!


The Creeper!!


Wolverine!!

Go to my flickr account and check out some of the work! Leave comments! This week I'll do another three panel strip so keep checking back!

You're An Asshole (Cripples)

2010-09-06T21:19:00.001-07:00

I did this months ago. I'm even slow at switching a comic from private to public on flickr. I'm more of a dick than the guy I draw these comics about.

You're An Asshole (Laugh Riot)

2010-08-11T01:17:00.001-07:00

It's too bad there are people in the world that don't get the basic necessities of life; sushi, diet coke, those socks that fit around your toes...

BIRTHDAY DRAGON HAPPY BIRTHDAY

2010-05-21T09:42:00.000-07:00

Here's a comic for everyone who's ever had a birthday!

OH HOW THE TABLES HAVE TURNED...

2010-04-20T20:41:00.000-07:00

...in the process of redecorating the room.

Would you like to see some drawings!?!?

That drawing of Kevin Marin's face is his personal emblem that I designed. At the top is my homework.

This page is the real beauty. Space girl, dinosaur, idea for a poster where I get people to let me draw stuff for them, even a drawing of a monster(future mascot of clam bake comics whether anyone likes it or not). Paying attention in class is not fun, so I don't do it!!

Meanwhile, not at MoCCA...

2010-04-11T00:18:00.000-07:00

I was only at MoCCA for like 5 minutes. But I did do this cool drawing. It's a kaiju created by Grizlli Atom that's based on this other thing based on this other thing.

He's a cool guy. Big too. And strapping. Looks a little like this...

Also right now I'm watching Logan's Run. How cool is this movie!!? Very cool.

BEST BUDS

2010-02-22T22:38:00.000-08:00

The Flying Guzman

Grizlli Atom

You're An Asshole (Stranded)

2010-02-11T21:42:00.000-08:00

I am aware of how crooked it is. I am the most cock eyed draw-er ever.

Some drawings after radio silence!

2010-01-04T13:46:00.000-08:00

This first drawing is for Mat Foley. He saw me drawing a sweet ass pic of Jubilee at King Con and asked if he could color it. But I was bored so I colored it myself. To make it up to him, I did another one. This should be viewed while listening to Yello's "Oh Yeah". You know the one in Ferris Bueller. Thanks to Anthony Stock for the song title.

Speaking of people I know, this is a drawing of a few characters from Rachel's teenage superhero comic LEAGUE. I wrote one script for her a few months back and I'm working on another now with these characters. It involves time travel as you can guess from this picture. Forgive the amateur hatching. I'm still learning how to do it right. Learn from my mistakes and pay attention in art class.

And I apologize also for the blue lines. Fuckin' non-photo blue ain't so non-photo. But the problem is that that doesn't apply to scanning in color. Sadly I have no other options.

KING CON

2009-11-11T14:20:00.000-08:00

The best part about King Con? The unisex bathrooms and people's surprise facial expressions when they walked in.

Drawings and details later!

You're An Asshole (Artist's Statement)

2009-09-25T22:56:00.000-07:00

So things didn't really work out with Tits. She was sweet and I was deeply, deeply in love with her... but then someone showed me some pictures of her in full light and I dunno. Sort of a butter face.

Anyways, here's a new comic!

Lucha Show Romance

2009-09-21T01:59:00.000-07:00

Hey guys, you won't be seeing much of me from now on. You see I went to this Lucha Libre show at Webster Hall tonight and, well, I've fallen in love. Things will be different now, since I'll be spending most of my time with her instead of drawing comics. I guess this whole finding love thing has really helped me grow up, put things in perspective. Comics just seem silly next to true love. BUT to commemorate this moment and give a sort of farewell gift to everyone who reads this blog and enjoys my comics, I did a drawing of my little lovey-dovey-munchkin-pumpkin!

It all happened pretty fast. She walked out onto the stage and bent over without bending her knees to pick up the pieces from the costume the last burlesque dancer left behind. Oh Cupid! What havoc hath ye wrought on my heart of hearts!

You're An Asshole (Lab Partner)

2009-09-13T16:40:00.000-07:00

So this comic is actually pretty old. You can tell because the lettering is totally different, and the desk has been whited-out (whitted-out?) poorly. I did this comic about two years ago. You would think that I'd have improved a little more since then. Anyway, the joke is similar to the comic before the last one I posted. That's because I'm consistent.

I wasn't going to post this so soon, but I really hate sitting around waiting for this shit. Besides chances are I'll forget to post it this week, so I might as well do it now.

You're An Asshole (Before the Golden Calf Business)

2009-09-11T13:49:00.001-07:00

I actually didn't make this comic. I found it in a museum. Crazy huh?

New Banner!

2009-08-29T11:21:00.000-07:00

Yeah how bad ass is that shit? Thanks to Grizzli Atom (Kevin Kusulas) for making the drawing into something less offensive to the human eye. Now every time you comment you make Kevin glad he's alive.

Chinese Taipei

2009-08-20T15:54:00.001-07:00

The other day I was walking around near Central Park and saw a group of Chinese athletes. When I saw their track jackets with the words Chinese Taipei emblazoned on the back I only thought of one thing...

Of course, I'm pretty sure these kids don't tape up their hands and cover them with broken glass.

Oh and here's a new comic. Yeah, it's pretty outrageously productive up in here, I know.

Yes, the last panel is lopsided. Funny story actually, I had to use a six inch ruler to make this comic (as well as another for tomorrow) so I ended up with a whole lot of angles. I'm no Bob Villa.

2009-07-29T19:28:00.001-07:00

Everything's bigger in Texas!

Wrong! Apparently there wasn't ONE person with a Ten Gallon Hat OR a Texas shaped belt buckle in Dallas today. My disappointment is overwhelming. Also I need to grow up...

I spent the weekend sitting around acting like a pre-pubescent boy.

You're An Asshole (Woodland Injustice)

2009-07-25T17:04:00.001-07:00

As of now I have nothing funny to say for this. Other than to apologize for having two posts in one day. I don't mean to pressure you into this relationship, I do want to take it slow it's just that...you're so fucking hot.

The Mighty Boosh

2009-07-25T09:11:00.001-07:00

The other day I went to go see the Mighty Boosh at their first New York show. It was pretty cool despite waiting on line from 10 am to 8 pm. I even met a few people on the line who were real swell. Sadly behind me on the line was the BIGGEST, MOST UNPLEASANT GIRL IN THE WORLD. She looked something like this,

She smelled really bad. Two people confirmed this.

You're An Asshole (Kick 'Em While Their Down)

2009-06-17T19:42:00.001-07:00

You can't assume that everybody can take ridicule and so called harmless jabs at their self-esteem all the time. If you don't keep it all in check and make sure that the person knows you're joking, you might have a pretty serious situation on your hands.

SORRY, WHAT DID YOU SAY? I COULDN'T HEAR YOU OVER THIS DORK'S CRIES FOR MERCY!

You're An Asshole (Hipster Party)

2009-06-17T19:33:00.001-07:00

Fashion is all about being on the cutting edge. It's not always easy and it isn't always a guaranteed popularity device. Sometimes you have to sift through a lot of nay-sayers before people realize that you were on to something.

YOU LOOK LIKE A FUCKING IDIOT.

The Living Dead

2009-06-17T01:50:00.000-07:00

These will likely never see the light of day. I won't say anymore.

"wah, I'm the head of the media board now plus I'm graduating this semester!"

Big deal.

So these are both comics that would have been included in the second issue of The Slow Clap, the Hunter College humor magazine. And here, they die.

Forgive the terrible coloring on this one. I hate doing it. Also it's kind of a Hunter specific joke. Just laugh when your friends laugh and no one should notice that you don't get it. The main character in it may as well be me, I really don't know why I drew some random guy. I mean, who am I kidding, I don't think about anything but me.

You're An Asshole (Top Of The Food Chain)

2009-06-17T01:09:00.001-07:00

The capitalist system seems to be structured around holding down minorities. We tout the American Dream but all we seem to offer are shattered dreams and broken promises...

BUT HEY GRAB THAT MEXICAN SO I CAN BOOST MYSELF OVER THIS BLACK GUY!

You're An Asshole (Racism)

2009-06-17T01:08:00.001-07:00

Open your eyes! Everyone is unique and special and I find it disturbing that most people cannot look past the color of someone's skin. Hopefully, after all the dust has settled of some grand and senseless race war, we'll all learn to live in harmony.

UNTIL THEN, AIM FOR THE FUCKING THROAT!

You're An Asshole (Sex Machines)

2009-06-17T01:07:00.001-07:00

It's unbelievable how women are degraded and objectified. Even today women are seen as less than a man, as if they're supposed to live to serve.

BUT DAMN AM I HUNGRY! BITCH COOK!

You're An Asshole (Sexual Deviant)

2009-06-17T01:06:00.001-07:00

The depravity of the internet is appalling. What's worse, we all just eat it up. It's truly sad how much the modern world has hacked away at our collective sense of decency.

HOLD ON A SEC, I NEED TO ADJUST MY BUTT PLUG!

You're An Asshole (Set Back The Cause)

2009-06-17T01:05:00.001-07:00

This Sunday there's going to be an important gathering of strong minded women on Governors Island. There will be tons of fun activities as well as a plethora of inspiring and powerful guest speakers. Overall it's going to be a great day for embracing your womanhood.

ALSO A GREAT DAY TO HAVE A PENIS! PENIS ENVY PENIS ENVY PENIS ENVY!

You're An Asshole (Early Childhood Education)

2009-06-17T01:04:00.001-07:00

Our school systems are constantly minimizing the importance of the arts in a child's education. If we could just put some more time and money into the creative endeavors of children, maybe there'd be less violence in the world...

THEN AGAIN MOST KIDS CANT DRAW FOR SHIT!

You're An Asshole (Poor People)

2009-06-17T01:02:00.001-07:00

Walking down the street today, my heart broke seeing the countless people suffering from a life of poverty...

GOOD THING US FAT WEALTHY PEOPLE CAN LAUGH AT IT!

You're An Asshole (Grandma's Grave)

2009-06-17T01:00:00.001-07:00

I swear, if there's one thing thats getting in the way of world peace, it's apathy. If only we all just helped each other out a little more, here and there.

BUT WHO CARES!? LAUGH YOUR DAYS AND NIGHTS AWAY!!